I’ve committed to writing these installments as a measure to try and help people navigate an uncertain and complex housing market and industry. I feel the situation is critical and knowledge is the pavement for a path through this unprecedented time. However, there comes a time when we must pause from our endeavors to simply sit quietly, and reflect. Memorial Day is one of those gifted opportunities. I came into the office today for some quiet time and frankly to “catch up” on work. As if we ever really catch up. The “quiet” part is where my grand plan took a hard turn. It is Memorial Day. Today, work is irrelevant. Today is a day for me to remember my privileges and obligations made possible by so many others.
I come from a family of military service. My dad was a product of the “Greatest Generation”. He was truly a great guy. I could actually write a daily blog about him and not run out of topics ‘til I die. Today I focus on one of his greatest attributes, his service to our nation. He was a farm boy from South Carolina. When the war broke out, he enlisted and served in the Army Corp of Engineers. I don’t know the complete story but I know enough. After basic training and lengthy prep to be shipped off, he found himself in Philadelphia, PA. Here he met my grandfather, who I never knew. He passed when I was 2. This guy (grandpa) evidently took a shine to my dad and brought him home to meet his daughter! This did not go well with my grandmother. My dad was, Lord help us, a Protestant! We are staunch Catholics. This went over like a fart in a phone booth. I could dwell here for 30 hysterical pages but, suffice to say, mom saw what grandpa saw. They fell in love and were married within 2 weeks when he was promptly shipped off to the Figi Islands in the South Pacific Theater of WWII. Dad came home badly wounded and spent months in a Texas hospital before mom even knew he was back in the country. This was the start of my family. They had 4 children. We were effectively 5 years apart. I was the last. I’m pretty certain my name should have been Oops! Catholics, what can I say?
My oldest brother served in the Army. He was a male nurse and an incredible guy. His service was not sterling. Let’s say he was a touch rebellious but managed to make it through. The military did change him to a great degree. He wound up pursuing Psychology as a vocation. He had some unfortunate residual conditions from his service that ultimately led him to permanent disability and ultimately his passing at 42 years young.
My sister, a force of nature on her own part, was quite beautiful. Smart & beautiful and routinely underestimated. She met a young man and they married. I remember him as a little kid. He was a riot to be around. Walking mischief would be a realistic assessment. He turned me on to Hockey; a cross between civil sport and the Colosseum. Then came Vietnam. He was a Corpsman in the Navy. It changed him. It stole what innocence he had and replaced it with a dark cynicism. Although a great guy, he was never the same. Scars we cannot see.
Then came my middle brother. We were a tall family. All of us. My sister was 5’11”. My brother, not so much. He was quite annoyed that me, his younger brother, was 6’1” while he was 5’8”-ish. Had a bit of an attitude but he was the funniest guy you’ve ever been around. He didn’t live life, he attached it with verve. He served as an Airborne Ranger and Ranger Instructor for 11 years. He was the best of the best. The rigors of service took a toll on him. He left the military and became a surveyor and draftsman. He was the best at that too. However, the scars of service were profound and he died from alcoholism. Also at age 42. I remember that my sister called me on my 43rd birthday. Expecting a terrible rendition of ‘Happy Birthday”, when I answered she exclaimed, “You made it!” I am only the 2nd male in my immediate family to make it to 43. So, she wasn’t wrong. We tend to be a touch irreverent. It’s an Irish thing. Everything is funny. We prefer a laugh to a cry.
I am the last. I chose not to serve although I was groomed from my early teens to do so. Ultimately, I chose not to. Now, late in life, I regret that decision. One might read what I have just written and empathize with that decision. All three of my role models carried significant scars from military service. Who in their right mind would want that!? So, why do they do it? It’s not like military service hides the practical realities. It’s the MILITARY! Duh! There is always the possibility of conflict. The possibility of death or perhaps worse, lasting injury. Yet, regardless of these realities, they continue to enlist. It’s not a secret that we do not honor our veterans with the care they deserve. This is not the fault of those caring for them by any measure. It’s our fault. Our priorities are selfish and broken. We haven’t hounded our representatives to the point of distraction to do what is right by our veterans. Military suicides are at an unimaginable level. Veterans make up a significant portion of our homeless population. Veterans, wounded and otherwise, struggle with employment and caring for their families after separation from service. We have the most powerful military the planet has ever seen and yet we say “we can’t afford” this or that. This is our legacy to them.
So, it’s an all-volunteer military in our country. In spite of all I have just written, they continue to enlist! Many of them aren’t even US citizens. Many are disadvantaged. You can say that they are taking advantage of the “benefits of service”. That is cynicism at its finest. Shame on you if that has ever crossed your lips. For the vast majority, I would say they are just exceptional people. Every one of them is a role model. Every one of them deserves our admiration and the fullness of our support. The world is a dangerous place. Freedom is a precious commodity that we have taken for granted. These people make it possible for the rest of us to enjoy the privilege it is to be an American. These people stand between us and those who would harm us and often others. It’s high time that we elevate them to the place in society and with the quality of life that they deserve. That is far more than one day of remembrance annually can provide. So, today while we remember our veterans, a little introspection is in order. Let’s ask ourselves, how much do we really appreciate their service? How might we realign our priorities from our wants to their needs? Today is a great day to ask these questions of ourselves. Without these great Americans, the questions that arise are a lot tougher. We really don’t want to know the answers.
May we take action by honoring their service in providing for their every need as our friends, family, neighbors and above all, the PROTECTORS OF OUR FREEDOM.
MAY GOD BLESS THE MEN AND WOMEN OF THE U.S. MILITARY WHEREVER THEY ARE.
Thank you for indulging me.
